This is a post for anyone who feels their beliefs – political, spiritual, personal, are aligned with truth, justice, and love. I would imagine most people, no matter what their ideological orientation, would identify themselves this way. An unfortunate but preventable side-effect of this identity is to assume that those beliefs that do not line up with ours, is something or someone that deserves to be shamed, blamed and even demonized. All in the name of truth justice and love. Do these principles actually require our critiques of another point of view to be cruel? I think it’s pretty obvious that they don’t, but the so -called satisfaction of a put-down is something that most people can’t resist. It feels justified, it feels righteous, it feels like power (but it isn’t).
One of the more popular ways people deride and abuse others is through “jokes.” These days, the “jokes” are passed around furiously via the meme machine.
I want to say that in my life, I have made a lot of passive-aggressive “jokes” because I did not know how else to deal with my anger. So I certainly get why people do it and how it can feel temporarily satisfying. But in truth, it’s not satisfying.
If you really believe that you are not on the side of anger and hatred, ask yourself why it is okay to exclude certain people and or perspectives – to put them in a category and look down on them until they “wise up.” (read: until they see it my way). I spent a lot of my life believing that my point of view was “the better one” and therefore, I was dismissive and yes, condescending to those whose views did not measure up to mine. As a teenager, I thought being a vegetarian was a superior position. Then it was “art is superior to sports”. Then spiritual ideas. I could go on with my personal catalog of how my identifications rained a subtle but constant sense of superiority that was trying to combat a persistent sense of insecurity and self-doubt. I have worked with this very painful tendency for quite some time now. The truth is, identifications mostly shift over time and this gives us an opportunity to apply some wisdom to our current point of view. Does it need to be defended vociferously? What if something changes our perspective? It has in the past, so why do we think "this is it"now? One of the great mysteries of life is that it constantly evolves. We either let it or suffer the weight of our own opinions.
It seems obvious that anyone who actually feels empowered, will naturally have no need to look down on other people with contempt and are capable of being critical without resorting to angry jokes or arrogance.
These times do encourage many to speak out for what they believe in, but if we don’t take care of how we are speaking, no matter how justified the position may be, we will not be effective. Love isn’t a theoretical perspective, or something that only some people are capable of, while others are “evil.” It is an active, inclusive energy. Love does not discriminate -we are the ones who are stingy and act as love misers – deciding who should and who should not be loved, based on our personal identifications.